Month: September 2014

Lucidity Extraction Free Rhyme

My does time fly. Or better yet soar. The wings of a flying dinosaur. Who am I subjected to? Surely not the nearest armadillo. Flax seed particles drown out the peanut butter and jelly. Writing without the bars of boundary or the walls of boxed thinking. StormTrooper attitude. A flashing flock of fighter fish float and flout gilled tradition. Somethings missin. I’ll check to see what it may be. Maybe it’s a grade D stack of grey bees? If a lighthouse fell in a foggy sea would anyone see it? Wouldn’t wanna be it. Leotards and glass shards packed into a backyard. Half charred half amazin. On the brink of going fully mad from a pepper cajun. I dance into a basin. Covered in bison I have to steer clear because they heard I have a license. To thrill, to build, to chill. Loosen your lug nuts I’m asking for a mil. And taking tons of pills. Ill will breathing down my neck waiting to Kill Bill. Apple slices towering above the hummer grill.

Nonsense by Zak Edelman


The Thief and the Golden Weathervane

The thief hated his neighbors privilege and conspicuous consumption, but reluctantly remained friendly.

Shaved the neighbor’s gold weathervane nightly in secret and hides the dust where only he knows.

The thief plans to eventually pawn the saved lump of gold several years later.

The night before the great pawn a storm slips by undetected by the altered weathervane and takes the thief’s life.

By Zak Edelman

Psychology of Surprise: A Customer’s Perspective

I am the silent victim of routines. There are pros and cons to following routines. The predictability affords me peace of mind. The redundancy at times makes me lose my mind. To go forth into the world everyday bound by these pretenses is now and again burdensome. Alas, the constraints of life seldom permit me to counteract the forces of the well trodden path. This is particularly why I’m subject to the thrill of surprise and its intoxicating effects.


Your Prospective Customer

By Zak Edelman

Act Natural – Never Copy – Be Yourself

Our tendency to mimic or imitate is only natural.

Don’t reinvent the wheel, don’t go against the grain. These trite cliches usually are reeled off by the defeated among us.

Biomimicry says nature does it best. Follow your gut instinct and extract your own genius by force if you have to. Uniqueness is a human imperative that I feel is interchangeable with the phrase self actualization.

Brilliant branding resides at my personal Facebook business page

By Zak Edelman

everything ado about nothing

Drink and drive a hard bargain. Intoxicate your audience. Look both ways before you laugh. Where do we get off with our understated socio-sexual norms? If I had one too many you can bet your bottom dollar the crowd was in a tizzy. Can you freak my unicorn..really blow that horn. Twice bitten by a redhead recluse. Only once would I gamble my life’s savings and get away with it. In the basement section of the stairwell things really heat up. Give me your glee and I’ll give you the broken keys to my heart. Please shut the gate and lock the windows before you hit the bricks. I want to know it’s real. If I close my eyes and you’re gone don’t come back without a fight.

Why Startups Should Think Like Insurance Companies

Nowadays it seems entrepreneurship is more popular than ever. The idea of working for ourselves and eventually building a business that can sustain us and our family is alluring. Venturing into the corporate storm brings a lot of potential opportunity as well as a lot of hidden uncertainty. I took some time to glean some valuable lessons from the insurance industry you can use on your journey to the top.

1. Sell them what they need.

If you focus on their needs (and blow their mind doing so) you’ll be right there when their want preferences expand as they inevitably do.

2. Be their unsung hero.

Like that friend that calls you out of the blue needing someone to talk to, be by their side and show you care at their critical moments of need.

3. View risk as opportunity.

Ever heard about the story of the bird that never got pushed out of the nest? I think you get my point. Looking like a jackass when you make a reversible mistake always trumps watching the competition make bank trying that unusual marketing tactic you thought of a few months prior.

Hopefully these ideas and concepts bolster your founder mindset. Happy transacting!

by Zak Edelman

Thoughts on a Super Saturday (#Caturday)

Sleep was glorious. It was like a cloud of helium balloons under me and a billowing breeze the pilot.

The weather is awesome in cleveland, ohio today. Partly sunny and mild. Bouncing from a bungee cord atop the Terminal Tower would be cool. Pumping up the bike tires and hitting the road is a must. High five some trails in the Metroparks. I wonder if the Oval Office was originally designed to accommodate eggheads. Half mile slip and slides. Expensive, elaborate pranks. Psychobio experiments. Fake tragedies. I’m going to be so much better at having fun. Idea workshops. My illustrious daydreams of what life will be like when I’m wealthy are on the verge of fruition.

Wednesday Eve in the Lab

At my buddy Presto the Artist’s crib. Chillaxin yo.

He’s working on an armature for a sculpture. Given his meticulous techniques it should be a hoot. We both been bit by the creative reptile. We venture to tip the scales. The ambient melody is Luscious Jackson. When we’re not overcome with the urge to freestyle rhyme the conversation can get weighty. Time tends to stand still as artificial light is warm and lively. A dear old friend Genesee rode along simply for the ride. Fucking tag along boisterous pest. Take 5 and plantain chips made the hops feel at home in the belly of the beast. Streams of consciousness splash about. Tides of epic proportions. Disruptive amounts of energy. Better yet; synergy. Pumpkin spice pancakes graced by the presence of quinoa, amaranth and flax. All natural can be a tastebud delight with the right investment of passion and rugged creativity.

It’s all about the journey.

-11:47 PM .Buy Zak Edelman

Wednesday Morning Milieu

The sun snuck in between the blinds and roundhouse kicked my eyelids. Laid me out. Or at least my hesitance to rise made it seem that way. I hobbled to the washroom and celebrated the small victory with a dance to ward off alarm clock shaped things. It’s been a few days since I’ve been taking amox to annihilate a pesky strep throat that threatened to take the pep out of my step last week. I’ve managed to adhere to the schedule and cast away the symptoms in the process.

I push my pillow to the side to clear off the bed. Meditating requires a relatively straight spine to enhance breathing and relaxation. 15 – 20 minute sessions a few times every week helps me give stress a warm place to stay instead of despising its mere visitation rights. Observing an involuntary bodily action affords me a glimpse into the majestic unknown of being a human. Yahoo!

Mom shoots me a ‘good morning’ text and poses the ‘wanna go shopping?’ query. I respond in the affirmative and offer up a fake timeline explaining I’m outside of her apartment already. She has a direct view of the parking lot so I get ‘lol why you so goofy’ response shortly thereafter. Oh mom, I’m not goofy I was hit by the goofy truck. And thankfully they also reversed and rolled me a couple more times. Humor makes me feel alive and so does the blaring absurdity sprinkled throughout the commonplace and mundane. Standing beneath the frigid waters of my shower I take a long, deep breath and lunge at the day with a fully stocked arsenal and weapons drawn. Let’s do this.

Blog Post Numero Uno. #1

The shadows seemed to be longing for darkness. I was talking ridiculous nonsense as usual. Winds snarled and the brown bag my PBR can was partially in leapt off the picnic table and sunk into the sand at the feet of the tiki bar.

It was a fluid ounce triathlon and guys were maxing out with sets of 22 oz. in hopes inebriation would replace the trophies they never won. Luckily, there were no injuries. Not surprisingly nobody had won, either.

by Zak Edelman